From The Shores of Oahu I have watched my children, run and splash. Breathe in the wonders of the sea. Soak in the Vitamin D, and Love every bit of the Gypsy (Military) Life. It has not phased them yet that we are movers. The Wind changes and we seem to be lifted off to new parts of our Country to explore. Change, so far, comes at them easily.
But This Traveler, I fear, worries about whats to come as they get older...
Worry!
Everyone who knows me, and knows our family, Knows we are worriers. From the moment they step off to school, off the edge of the pool, or onto the top stair...I worry.
But I do not pretend to be a great parent. I don't create False identities or fictional persona's of what our family life is like. I am not fake. Guarded Maybe, maybe too much at times, but not Fake. I speak on all aspects of life. The good the bad and the ugly. All of that and more. I try to paint the most realistic picture I can.
Everyone who knows me, and knows our Family, Knows we do not sensor. Much to many friends and family surprise...It works for us. We will always take into consideration the knowledge and if and how the impact will be. But we do not sensor. Our Children, know the appropriate use of such knowledge and Are pretty good and not exploring it. Ryan in his rebellious and pushing button 3's like to walk the fine line, but also knows the consequence. Granted, I am a push over as well. They each get away with treating me a certain way, and As they are growing, im learning how to better direct their negative reactions. Which is a part of Parenthood no. Parents will continue to grow and change and learn, and adapt, methods to their kids, individually and as a whole. A continuous juggle, but as I've stated before, our children should be our first priority. Sure...Love God, Love ourselves, Love your husband, love your kids. Our Children will be molded By God's Hands, understand Direction, experience love, be successful because We have taught them about respect and order. Allowing them to be themselves and witness acts that will help them grow into awesome adults. Already, I can see how our kids have blessed us, changed us, molded us even. I've seen the good things we've done with them. Again Ill speak on Ryan, even in these 3's that I dread, and Am So thankful hes my last 3 yr old for now...Has such a soft spot. He kisses any boo boo's he sees on me, old or new. Always says "thank You", sometimes "thank You much" even if its to wipe an eye lash off his cheek. He always needs my hand when out. Sophie will cuddle All day long. Rub my hand or cheek if Im laying down. Wants everyone around her to always sign thank you, when appropriate, and will wait there till its signed :P is mothering in her class, cares for little kids and babies SO much. Emily is reserved and kind, quite and example of nice behavior for her siblings when we are out of the house. Sure In public they have each had their Moments of "OH MY GOSH ITS TIME WE GO HOME" but Proudly I would say they are well behaved beyond our front door 94% of the time. Home...In their comfort and glory, yeah its not as rosey, no hand raising here, no mild manners. But I would take the "mother may I's" the "yes ma'ams, No sirs" "please and Thank You's" out in public over home, any day of the week. And we are thankful for that. We Do have great kids.
One thing I've noticed about Hawaii, is that people are just so inviting. Warm. Understanding and eager. I took the kids to get sandwiches the other day before our HSDB principal meeting, The woman behind the counter saw Sophie signing something over and over. I was distracted By Ryan and Emily talking over each other, when the woman smiled and said "Ma'am,Shes saying soemthing I don't quite get" Soph, was saying "green" something on the menu had caught her eye. I in my now regular guarded tone say "Its ok, Don't worry about it" like a snot lol. And the Kind woman continued to smile and said "oh but Im curious, I really would like to know, and know more" And in that second I felt a piece of my wall break off. "green" I said. "shes signing green" The woman looked all around to find something That Sophie was referring to, and was happy to help. 3 Times In the same hour, We were talked too about Sophie, IN A POSITIVE MANNER! Who would have thought. Washington was so cold in peoples demeanor that after those 2 years I started to become jaded. But You see, As HSDB Has worked its signing magic on Sophie, and as her Vocabulary expands greatly, we are holding more lengthy Conversations, and that in public. Its amazing How much signing Catches the Eyes of strangers. People should be naturally curious right? Not Mean...In any case, another Employee had stopped by our table to ask if We are signing because Shes deaf, or just because. Which of course made me giggle. I too was a young mom with Emily, teaching my baby to sign because it was the Hip thing to do. When I smiled and said of shes deaf...(my smile was a bitch smile, again I mastered in Tacoma)The young woman smiled back and said awesome, so is my little sister and its been really hard. There it goes again, a little piece of the wall breaking off. A bit later, there was an older couple sitting across the aisle from us. With them an man maybe just a bit older then I who rocked the extra Chromosome So wonderfully. (everyone who knows me...knows I have a soft spot for down syndrome <3)They stood Up after their meals and walked right behind Sophie. The Father Gently patted Sophies head, and made a weird playful sound at Ryan who basically stood up and roared at the guy LOL LOL. His Wife stood next to him, as I signed to Phi, "say Hi, and smile" because she looked very...confused as to why a stranger was behind her. Phi did just as I asked. The older woman replied "Shes deaf right? shes beautiful, they all are" Her husband giggled "you sure have your hands full" The nice way of saying "good luck" We got a nice "have a good night and God Bless" And a nice wave from their son.
All this in not only one day, but one hour, of me and just the kiddos. My My how the tides have changed, literally. I looked back at the kids, just us again at the table...And I knew that Matt and I, are doing a good job.
Are we perfect parents? Absolutely not! Our Kids will not be perfect.THey Will make mistakes like us, bad judgement calls, be tried and tried again and again. Will lose and win and fall and get hurt. Cry. Hurt someone. But they will also do great things.
Im a very guarded person these days. The Military life has created in me a much different idea of how life works. Having had kids and marriage extremely young in life, its a good thing the military has shown me. nearly 4 years an Army wife, which seems weird to me. Moving everywhere we have, living on bases and off. Taking away lessons from each and every City, town, or village we'd seen, has molded us. And Now, here in Hawaii, Where the sky is Always blue, and the air so clear, where people smile, and show support I may break down this wall...
Monday, September 9, 2013
Monday, August 12, 2013
Birthday Wishes and Wedding Bells.
One thing For sure about the Month of August, is that it totally rocks!
Im partial, since Not only is it my BIRTHDAY month, but its My Lovey Hubby's
and My best Friends Birthday Month as well!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME, AND US, AND YOU, And ME ME ME ;)
Its the Month We always spent Heading to the beaches, its the month we claim the most of Summer in. It was the Last chance to complete the Summer bucket list, before heading back to school each year.
And when I think about it...Matt and I are so privileged to have been able to spend Our birthdays together and in So many different places. This year In Honolulu <3 whhhhat We've celebrated after Leaving New York at 19 in wonderful places like : Phoenix Arizona Sumner Iowa New York (again) Clearwater/ Tampa Florida Fort Irwin/ Los Angeles California Tacoma Washington And Now Honolulu Hawaii Seems so weird No? I absolutely Love birthdays...the Continuation into a New year. 30 is quickly approaching and Im Psyched My 20's have been so extremely full...over whelming...exciting...but so full. Between all our travels, marriage and 3 kids I welcome the 30's. As All our Children are now completely out of the baby stage. 2 now being in Full time School and Ryan...Being too smart for his own good. Im welcoming the end of my 20's. Sure Im only turning 28 this year, but it gives me 2 more years to jam pack and make way for some breezier 30's.
Happy Birthday Month Dawny!!!
I miss my Dawny. Our birthday Months together were always so fabulous. Especially the one we got to spend together in Florida. I miss the crazy games and conversations we would have in front of the boys just to make them sit there, scratching their heads, wondering..."what is wrong with them" Miss her Kids all 4,000 of them ;) since her house is the Hub for all things Arnold <3 Family. Family. Family. Here I go again, speaking on something thats SO screwed up. I am definitely NOT the person anyone should seek for counsel on Family feuding. But, if they are looking for someone to tell them exactly what to say and do, to put a giant sized Wedge between them..Im the girl~ I have Full accepted, admitted, and taken responsibility for the Shit I did and said. All of which, I believe as my own truth, my version, my side, and reason for the fact Im not thought of as a part of their family anymore. I feel like now 3 years into feuding, and trying to reach out in different ways to mend it, that Theres no possible reconnection. Yet, Family is supposed to be able to for give, for get and move on. Forget Yesterday. So hard to do. So hard to do. I dwell I list I go tit for tat I compare he did, she said, I did, So I said. Human nature I guess. But...When it comes to family, shouldn't there be different rules at play? Its not like, We met when we were 10 got super close, then had a falling out and never want to see each other again...Its family. Life, here in the Decker house, has been painfully hard at times. Wouldn't a Father want to know? Shouldn't they care? And Give advice, or be a listening ear? Shouldn't a Grandparent, want to keep in touch with their grandkids, Not just hang pictures of them on their wall, like it makes up for anything? Especially during a crazy transition like they have gone through with moving, or In Sophies case with Surgery, and processing, and Transferring to an All deaf School? Shouldn't A daughter, want and need and hope to learn about wedding bells from her own dad. Sure, Brothers are the next best thing to get news from...But One would hope, that such, great news, such life changing events, should be shared among everyone. Thats All I wanted, as I told my brothers. I said. Thank You for telling me, I think thats fantastic. Now I want to see if Dad lets me know himself....weeks went by...Moved...weeks went by some more...Now only a few days from their date and My emails to him have not been responded to. :( I just wanted to show my joy. And Simply ask, if he considered reaching out and tell me. Have not been given the chance, Maybe one day I've since Changed my cell number since moving to Honolulu, but my email address has always been the same, for the last 6 years. And As I dwell, and compare, and go tit for tat, after getting no response...I then laugh at myself. How Silly. True, We invited him to Our "wedding" the only one we could afford after being told we have to now pay it all ourselves since Emily came first. And True, he decided to not Show up! And True It was done the day before his birthday. And True now they are marrying a week before mine...And True he can not stand the man I married. But UNTRUE, that I do not like Jessica. And UNTRUE, that Im not happy for them marrying. Oddly...things are not so different. In the lives we lead. Though We now know nothing about whats going on...in the day to day routines. we are not so different. Where can one go from here? Does it matter? is It possible? Is it mutual? A Wise Man in my Family, Once pulled me aside, to say, That the Sins of the Father are visited Upon the Children. And To walk carefully. The Conversation had always stuck close to me, I still remember where we were, the weather outside, and that it felt like the First honest and open (in non joking manners)conversation we had ever had before... It got me thinking about, Foot steps. And how we eventually, most of us anyway, wind up walking the same path as our parents. And its Our choices, that make the difference. Its our life, and our sins, we are to be accounted for. And if we are not careful. We can all wind up, with 1000's of miles between, passing away without having ever said, to the other...You know what, Im sorry and was foolish but I never stopped to let go of my anger to show show you I still do love you. Like Fathers, and mothers, before us. I take Full responsibility for my part. I know where I fall short...and because of my faults, and my sins, and my foolishness, and my pains and suffering I do not want our kids to thus have to be burdened and because of this separation it puts wedges between others too...I miss my Little Brothers, And Missed so much of their exciting life changing events as well
Exodus 34:6-7) - "Then the Lord passed by in front of him and proclaimed, "The Lord, the Lord God, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in loving kindness and truth; 7 who keeps loving kindness for thousands, who forgives iniquity, transgression and sin; yet He will by no means leave the guilty unpunished, visiting the iniquity of fathers on the children and on the grandchildren to the third and fourth generations."
Slow to Anger! Something My brother Kept saying this past weekend. Slow to Anger.
A task we have trouble with, something we need to work on. I need to work on.
So with Birthday wishes, for myself and my near and dears...
I also wish Joy and fulfillment, honesty and truth to each other and to themselves, in a Gracious and wholesomely long Marriage.
God Bless and best wishes on your happy day.
And Just because, Im so in love with the theme song from my new Fav ABC family Show...I have to include this song. It brings tears to me every time. Its beautiful. And Meaningful and ALMOST perfect for todays blog :)
I am thankful for my Family I do have. For my hard working Husband, and for my crazy loving Bunches of oats~
Family, Friends, and where blood doesn't make family, acceptance and love Makes Family, are welcomed
Im partial, since Not only is it my BIRTHDAY month, but its My Lovey Hubby's
and My best Friends Birthday Month as well!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME, AND US, AND YOU, And ME ME ME ;)
Its the Month We always spent Heading to the beaches, its the month we claim the most of Summer in. It was the Last chance to complete the Summer bucket list, before heading back to school each year.
And when I think about it...Matt and I are so privileged to have been able to spend Our birthdays together and in So many different places. This year In Honolulu <3 whhhhat We've celebrated after Leaving New York at 19 in wonderful places like : Phoenix Arizona Sumner Iowa New York (again) Clearwater/ Tampa Florida Fort Irwin/ Los Angeles California Tacoma Washington And Now Honolulu Hawaii Seems so weird No? I absolutely Love birthdays...the Continuation into a New year. 30 is quickly approaching and Im Psyched My 20's have been so extremely full...over whelming...exciting...but so full. Between all our travels, marriage and 3 kids I welcome the 30's. As All our Children are now completely out of the baby stage. 2 now being in Full time School and Ryan...Being too smart for his own good. Im welcoming the end of my 20's. Sure Im only turning 28 this year, but it gives me 2 more years to jam pack and make way for some breezier 30's.
Happy Birthday Month Dawny!!!
I miss my Dawny. Our birthday Months together were always so fabulous. Especially the one we got to spend together in Florida. I miss the crazy games and conversations we would have in front of the boys just to make them sit there, scratching their heads, wondering..."what is wrong with them" Miss her Kids all 4,000 of them ;) since her house is the Hub for all things Arnold <3 Family. Family. Family. Here I go again, speaking on something thats SO screwed up. I am definitely NOT the person anyone should seek for counsel on Family feuding. But, if they are looking for someone to tell them exactly what to say and do, to put a giant sized Wedge between them..Im the girl~ I have Full accepted, admitted, and taken responsibility for the Shit I did and said. All of which, I believe as my own truth, my version, my side, and reason for the fact Im not thought of as a part of their family anymore. I feel like now 3 years into feuding, and trying to reach out in different ways to mend it, that Theres no possible reconnection. Yet, Family is supposed to be able to for give, for get and move on. Forget Yesterday. So hard to do. So hard to do. I dwell I list I go tit for tat I compare he did, she said, I did, So I said. Human nature I guess. But...When it comes to family, shouldn't there be different rules at play? Its not like, We met when we were 10 got super close, then had a falling out and never want to see each other again...Its family. Life, here in the Decker house, has been painfully hard at times. Wouldn't a Father want to know? Shouldn't they care? And Give advice, or be a listening ear? Shouldn't a Grandparent, want to keep in touch with their grandkids, Not just hang pictures of them on their wall, like it makes up for anything? Especially during a crazy transition like they have gone through with moving, or In Sophies case with Surgery, and processing, and Transferring to an All deaf School? Shouldn't A daughter, want and need and hope to learn about wedding bells from her own dad. Sure, Brothers are the next best thing to get news from...But One would hope, that such, great news, such life changing events, should be shared among everyone. Thats All I wanted, as I told my brothers. I said. Thank You for telling me, I think thats fantastic. Now I want to see if Dad lets me know himself....weeks went by...Moved...weeks went by some more...Now only a few days from their date and My emails to him have not been responded to. :( I just wanted to show my joy. And Simply ask, if he considered reaching out and tell me. Have not been given the chance, Maybe one day I've since Changed my cell number since moving to Honolulu, but my email address has always been the same, for the last 6 years. And As I dwell, and compare, and go tit for tat, after getting no response...I then laugh at myself. How Silly. True, We invited him to Our "wedding" the only one we could afford after being told we have to now pay it all ourselves since Emily came first. And True, he decided to not Show up! And True It was done the day before his birthday. And True now they are marrying a week before mine...And True he can not stand the man I married. But UNTRUE, that I do not like Jessica. And UNTRUE, that Im not happy for them marrying. Oddly...things are not so different. In the lives we lead. Though We now know nothing about whats going on...in the day to day routines. we are not so different. Where can one go from here? Does it matter? is It possible? Is it mutual? A Wise Man in my Family, Once pulled me aside, to say, That the Sins of the Father are visited Upon the Children. And To walk carefully. The Conversation had always stuck close to me, I still remember where we were, the weather outside, and that it felt like the First honest and open (in non joking manners)conversation we had ever had before... It got me thinking about, Foot steps. And how we eventually, most of us anyway, wind up walking the same path as our parents. And its Our choices, that make the difference. Its our life, and our sins, we are to be accounted for. And if we are not careful. We can all wind up, with 1000's of miles between, passing away without having ever said, to the other...You know what, Im sorry and was foolish but I never stopped to let go of my anger to show show you I still do love you. Like Fathers, and mothers, before us. I take Full responsibility for my part. I know where I fall short...and because of my faults, and my sins, and my foolishness, and my pains and suffering I do not want our kids to thus have to be burdened and because of this separation it puts wedges between others too...I miss my Little Brothers, And Missed so much of their exciting life changing events as well
Exodus 34:6-7) - "Then the Lord passed by in front of him and proclaimed, "The Lord, the Lord God, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in loving kindness and truth; 7 who keeps loving kindness for thousands, who forgives iniquity, transgression and sin; yet He will by no means leave the guilty unpunished, visiting the iniquity of fathers on the children and on the grandchildren to the third and fourth generations."
Slow to Anger! Something My brother Kept saying this past weekend. Slow to Anger.
A task we have trouble with, something we need to work on. I need to work on.
So with Birthday wishes, for myself and my near and dears...
I also wish Joy and fulfillment, honesty and truth to each other and to themselves, in a Gracious and wholesomely long Marriage.
God Bless and best wishes on your happy day.
And Just because, Im so in love with the theme song from my new Fav ABC family Show...I have to include this song. It brings tears to me every time. Its beautiful. And Meaningful and ALMOST perfect for todays blog :)
I am thankful for my Family I do have. For my hard working Husband, and for my crazy loving Bunches of oats~
Family, Friends, and where blood doesn't make family, acceptance and love Makes Family, are welcomed
Friday, July 5, 2013
Make sure...
The altered state of mind leaves us yearning for more
Left in our sub-conscience sense that we can obtain all these things we so wildly dream of.
And its apparent that while in truth we should always dream and strive and hope and love and adore
That we must continue to keep ourselves in reality. Reality is best worn with a sweetly Sane and perfect pair of sneakers...For those moments we try to run, run from our truths, run from ourselves and our responsibilities.
Please
Always remain tethered to the very thing that keeps us grounded.
Ties are better left knotted, Not severed.
Remember
Days are best dressed with a smile
Nights with a lovely hued glass of wine.
And
Make sure...
Left in our sub-conscience sense that we can obtain all these things we so wildly dream of.
And its apparent that while in truth we should always dream and strive and hope and love and adore
That we must continue to keep ourselves in reality. Reality is best worn with a sweetly Sane and perfect pair of sneakers...For those moments we try to run, run from our truths, run from ourselves and our responsibilities.
Please
Always remain tethered to the very thing that keeps us grounded.
Ties are better left knotted, Not severed.
Remember
Days are best dressed with a smile
Nights with a lovely hued glass of wine.
And
Make sure...
Wednesday, June 5, 2013
Theres Always those people...
There will always be that person that rubs you the wrong way
There will always be those people who don't understand you
There will always be that person that tries to "correct" your methods
There will always be those people who talk behind your back
There will always be that person who will always come to your defense
There Will always be those people whom you never will forget
People, Persons, friend, Enemy, family and just someone you know...
People who really know you, People you trust, people that love you, People that show respect
People who are fake, people who do not like you, people who want to see you harmed. People...
WHO KICK WHEN OTHERS ARE DOWN.
People who inspire, people who cheer you on, people who take part in your success
People who drag you down
People who Challenge you
People who rob your sanity
People who advise you
People who ruin you
People who make you better
But
These people are not you. They are not living your life, they are not behind your closed doors.
They are not in your shoes, or in your mind or in your heart per say.
Ultimately it is Ourselves that decide to allow such People to do these things to us, good or bad.
We have to power to allow these persons in our lives. To allow them to treat us as so. To allow them into your heart and thoughts and future.
We have the right to walk away from harsh people, and surround ourselves with genuine People.
We are the company we keep.
Which is the funny part of it all. When you surround yourself with light, You are light, you feel light, you give off light.
Some people have a hard time once fallen into the deep nature of darkness that its hard to walk away.
But Hopefully one day they can.
This is not some crazy insight, friends.
This is not my hippy self saying "go into the light"
Peace, love and incense will make it ok.
Burn the sage and feel the love.
hahaha
This is simply about remember who you are, and loving yourself enough to be free of those People.
Theres always those people...but knowing yourself, and appreciating your worth, makes all the difference in the World :)
There will always be those people who don't understand you
There will always be that person that tries to "correct" your methods
There will always be those people who talk behind your back
There will always be that person who will always come to your defense
There Will always be those people whom you never will forget
People, Persons, friend, Enemy, family and just someone you know...
People who really know you, People you trust, people that love you, People that show respect
People who are fake, people who do not like you, people who want to see you harmed. People...
WHO KICK WHEN OTHERS ARE DOWN.
People who inspire, people who cheer you on, people who take part in your success
People who drag you down
People who Challenge you
People who rob your sanity
People who advise you
People who ruin you
People who make you better
But
These people are not you. They are not living your life, they are not behind your closed doors.
They are not in your shoes, or in your mind or in your heart per say.
Ultimately it is Ourselves that decide to allow such People to do these things to us, good or bad.
We have to power to allow these persons in our lives. To allow them to treat us as so. To allow them into your heart and thoughts and future.
We have the right to walk away from harsh people, and surround ourselves with genuine People.
We are the company we keep.
Which is the funny part of it all. When you surround yourself with light, You are light, you feel light, you give off light.
Some people have a hard time once fallen into the deep nature of darkness that its hard to walk away.
But Hopefully one day they can.
This is not some crazy insight, friends.
This is not my hippy self saying "go into the light"
Peace, love and incense will make it ok.
Burn the sage and feel the love.
hahaha
This is simply about remember who you are, and loving yourself enough to be free of those People.
Theres always those people...but knowing yourself, and appreciating your worth, makes all the difference in the World :)
Monday, June 3, 2013
Same Love
Macklemore "same Love"
Has the best message in this song. A Native Seattle-ton. Making Great points. The first few times I heard this on the Radio I kept tearing up.
The Lyrics
When I was in the third grade I thought that I was gay,
'Cause I could draw, my uncle was, and I kept my room straight.
I told my mom, tears rushing down my face
She's like "Ben you've loved girls since before pre-k, trippin' "
Yeah, I guess she had a point, didn't she?
Bunch of stereotypes all in my head.
I remember doing the math like, "Yeah, I'm good at little league"
A preconceived idea of what it all meant
For those that liked the same sex
Had the characteristics
The right wing conservatives think it's a decision
And you can be cured with some treatment and religion
Man-made rewiring of a predisposition
Playing God, aw nah here we go
America the brave still fears what we don't know
And God loves all his children, is somehow forgotten
But we paraphrase a book written thirty-five-hundred years ago
I don't know
And I can't change
Even if I tried
Even if I wanted to
And I can't change
Even if I try
Even if I wanted to
My love
My love
My love
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
If I was gay, I would think hip-hop hates me
Have you read the YouTube comments lately?
"Man, that's gay" gets dropped on the daily
We become so numb to what we're saying
A culture founded from oppression
Yet we don't have acceptance for 'em
Call each other faggots behind the keys of a message board
A word rooted in hate, yet our genre still ignores it
Gay is synonymous with the lesser
It's the same hate that's caused wars from religion
Gender to skin color, the complexion of your pigment
The same fight that led people to walk outs and sit ins
It's human rights for everybody, there is no difference!
Live on and be yourself
When I was at church they taught me something else
If you preach hate at the service those words aren't anointed
That holy water that you soak in has been poisoned
When everyone else is more comfortable remaining voiceless
Rather than fighting for humans that have had their rights stolen
I might not be the same, but that's not important
No freedom till we're equal, damn right I support it
(I don't know)
And I can't change
Even if I tried
Even if I wanted to
My love
My love
My love
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
We press play, don't press pause
Progress, march on
With the veil over our eyes
We turn our back on the cause
Till the day that my uncles can be united by law
When kids are walking 'round the hallway plagued by pain in their heart
A world so hateful some would rather die than be who they are
And a certificate on paper isn't gonna solve it all
But it's a damn good place to start
No law is gonna change us
We have to change us
Whatever God you believe in
We come from the same one
Strip away the fear
Underneath it's all the same love
About time that we raised up
And I can't change
Even if I tried
Even if I wanted to
And I can't change
Even if I try
Even if I wanted to
My love
My love
My love
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
Love is patient
Love is kind
Love is patient
Love is kind
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is patient
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is kind
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is patient
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is kind
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is patient
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is kind
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is patient
Love is kind
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
The Learning Curve
phew~
Whirlwind of a few years, since Matt Joined into the Military. A proud and faithful Soldier he is, who longs for MORE involvement into the Ranks. Who longs for Deployment, who longs to lead.
Having Moved around this beautiful Country, We have had the priviledge and gift of travel. That has yet to stop. As we approach the final weeks here in Washington state, I'm Starting to see the Curve.
What we have learned, gained, lost, re-found.
These 2 years here in Washington have been the most trying of times. Seriously. And that's saying a lot. Seeing how we were merely 20 when we took that giant leap of faith moving away from our friends and family and comfort of Our Home town. Seeing how we struggled often, having been on food stamps at one point, no cars at other points. Even trying to survive on Iowa minimum wage of 7.50 once. Living with parents (again and again).Living on unemployment checks. To the obsolete desert of California where low and behold, discovering our daughter to be deaf, and having an infant. All the while trying to fit into the very different life style the army offers. One would think that all that chaos would have trumped the last 2 years here...
But it doesn't.
Here,
sadly. Among the beauty and actual dependence of the weather. Has been the toughest years EVER.
Tough in the Company my husband is a part of. Tough on our children. Tough on our marriage. Tough moments in our friendship in our marriage. And toughest financially. All to which make seem, learning A 2nd language simple. Adjusting to our kids getting big, way too fast, simple. The lack of solid friendships here and feeling lost and lonely, do not help Im sure. Or maybe its the actual lack of sun soaked Vitamin D bodies. who knows.
We have wondered more here in WA about our future...or lack there of. Then in any crazy chapter we've finished.
So while this Up coming move has been way daunting and annoying and hard, and tiresome. And what seems like never coming, with endless road blocks...We are embracing this change. With the highest of hopes that it brings us better yearly fortune. That we can get back into a happy go lucky, go with the follow identity. That we wont just be survivors of this new adventure but thrive within it. Make strides that count toward repairs individually and within our family.
Its true that if you can with stand the woes and lows and make it out still together and growing...then theres hope for a brighter tomorrow, No?
So with all the ups and downs, through out every aspect we've encountered since the day we settled in Over this state line. I pray it did make us stronger.
We only want the best for our family. Together, and strong. happy and excited about new things. Happy healthy children.
Polished.
Washington is a different kind of breed. Man oh Man.
I've said it before, that People who have never been here yet think that cold hard assed New Yorkers are the epitamony of ill tempered humans have never walked The streets of Seattle. No state...can trump the cold native Northwestern embrace of Washingtonians.
We were excited to come here. Had high hopes of the rainy state (something we do not mind actually) But There was no warning for the ill mannerism. NONE~ And After 2 years of being here I've actually felt the lose of my NY edge. These People scare me. Who would have thought?
We have not seen all that we wanted to see of WA. Still, We take away some good memories. Fun outdoor adventures we did gather under our belts. For me I take away the Beauty and awe of the Puget Sound. My favorite Spots are along the rocky beaches that surround the water. Where you enjoy seeing nature at its finest. Watch the Ferry's create tiny waves, and see the peak of Mount Rainier off in the distance.
The pure fact of it all, is Washington is where our Kids grew from babies...to Little kids.
Where Matt and I, figured each other out better...despite our 9 years of being together. <3 :="" p="">
Fingers are crossed, prayers are said daily. That the magic of the Island wields growth and promise.
We have learned much, and of course that wont stop.
But since we have now Passed the Curve and open waters are ahead, we are looking forward to a good few years of smooth(er) Sailing
Hello, More World.
Goodbye Seattle
Whirlwind of a few years, since Matt Joined into the Military. A proud and faithful Soldier he is, who longs for MORE involvement into the Ranks. Who longs for Deployment, who longs to lead.
Having Moved around this beautiful Country, We have had the priviledge and gift of travel. That has yet to stop. As we approach the final weeks here in Washington state, I'm Starting to see the Curve.
What we have learned, gained, lost, re-found.
These 2 years here in Washington have been the most trying of times. Seriously. And that's saying a lot. Seeing how we were merely 20 when we took that giant leap of faith moving away from our friends and family and comfort of Our Home town. Seeing how we struggled often, having been on food stamps at one point, no cars at other points. Even trying to survive on Iowa minimum wage of 7.50 once. Living with parents (again and again).Living on unemployment checks. To the obsolete desert of California where low and behold, discovering our daughter to be deaf, and having an infant. All the while trying to fit into the very different life style the army offers. One would think that all that chaos would have trumped the last 2 years here...
But it doesn't.
Here,
sadly. Among the beauty and actual dependence of the weather. Has been the toughest years EVER.
Tough in the Company my husband is a part of. Tough on our children. Tough on our marriage. Tough moments in our friendship in our marriage. And toughest financially. All to which make seem, learning A 2nd language simple. Adjusting to our kids getting big, way too fast, simple. The lack of solid friendships here and feeling lost and lonely, do not help Im sure. Or maybe its the actual lack of sun soaked Vitamin D bodies. who knows.
We have wondered more here in WA about our future...or lack there of. Then in any crazy chapter we've finished.
So while this Up coming move has been way daunting and annoying and hard, and tiresome. And what seems like never coming, with endless road blocks...We are embracing this change. With the highest of hopes that it brings us better yearly fortune. That we can get back into a happy go lucky, go with the follow identity. That we wont just be survivors of this new adventure but thrive within it. Make strides that count toward repairs individually and within our family.
Its true that if you can with stand the woes and lows and make it out still together and growing...then theres hope for a brighter tomorrow, No?
So with all the ups and downs, through out every aspect we've encountered since the day we settled in Over this state line. I pray it did make us stronger.
We only want the best for our family. Together, and strong. happy and excited about new things. Happy healthy children.
Polished.
Washington is a different kind of breed. Man oh Man.
I've said it before, that People who have never been here yet think that cold hard assed New Yorkers are the epitamony of ill tempered humans have never walked The streets of Seattle. No state...can trump the cold native Northwestern embrace of Washingtonians.
We were excited to come here. Had high hopes of the rainy state (something we do not mind actually) But There was no warning for the ill mannerism. NONE~ And After 2 years of being here I've actually felt the lose of my NY edge. These People scare me. Who would have thought?
We have not seen all that we wanted to see of WA. Still, We take away some good memories. Fun outdoor adventures we did gather under our belts. For me I take away the Beauty and awe of the Puget Sound. My favorite Spots are along the rocky beaches that surround the water. Where you enjoy seeing nature at its finest. Watch the Ferry's create tiny waves, and see the peak of Mount Rainier off in the distance.
The pure fact of it all, is Washington is where our Kids grew from babies...to Little kids.
Where Matt and I, figured each other out better...despite our 9 years of being together. <3 :="" p="">
Fingers are crossed, prayers are said daily. That the magic of the Island wields growth and promise.
We have learned much, and of course that wont stop.
But since we have now Passed the Curve and open waters are ahead, we are looking forward to a good few years of smooth(er) Sailing
Hello, More World.
Goodbye Seattle
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)