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Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Simply By Taste

Its been a good long while since I have posted anything here on my blog. Gosh I cant believe it. For A while Now Ive been wanting to post, but not exactly sure of how to start it. Writers Block? Maybe. With lots to say, and not really sure how to get it all out...at least with out me soundly like a lunatic...AGAIN :)
But then it hit me. In regards to a facebooks status someone I know posted, that had to do with Creationism vs Evolution. It started to make me think about differences of opinion. Different thought processes, back grounds, beliefs and life styles. Different opinions. Right or Wrong not having anything to do with how the person chooses to live life.
There are some people out there who would very much prefer to indulge in sweet Cherry pie

Vs the tarty goodness of a beautiful Apple pie. Some do not like pie at all. Some think Pie doesnt just have to be a dessert

While some of us love to wake up each morning and smell the salt ocean Waters, others like the feeling of being secluded and lost in the mountains, surrounded by air and Wild life.

Just as Some of us are believers in Christ and others do not understand. Like understanding the difference between religion and believing. Its hard for some to grasp the amount of Power that is From Our heavenly father, and to believe in such things as Heaven, hell, Satan, and Angels.
I have the beliefs that were recorded from with in the Bible. While Im not a perfect Christian, I do not use what I know about my Savior, and forgiveness and my salvation to be an excuse to do Horrible things. I do my best to still walk a worthy, Christ like Life, and Allow others to form their own opinions about their life.

In other ways we all differ from our taste in LOCATION~ thehehe. Im an advid mover. Mover of all movers, who long for change and open road and meeting new people and seeing fresh new Places. Some however prefer to live in the same place their entire life. Never really embracing the land that The Lord has provided for us to explore. Some prefer the West...Some the East. Others the South. In my little World Tho ive seen many places theres things about Each side of the GREAT U.S.A that I love.
West vs East. Ive gained a little bit more understanding of the convited West coast. The Laid back People, the year round weather, the Hippie Life style, the Convertable car weather, Tons of Dog parks, Long Summer nights, Beautiful Sea life at your finger tips. But The New Yorker in Me will always love the East Coast, New York being #1 always. From the "real" types of People, the Wonderful accent (though Orange County really has an accent of their own, kind of a North Jersey meets Brooklyn fusion kind of thing)The Attitude, the Culture, the Fashion,The Nail tip wearing style hoarding types. The let me get in your face, then kiss you like we are sisters kind of fighting. grudge holding, honestly Wonderful New Yorkers. Not to mention the Only place you can get Chinese Food that Looks like it should, and Pizza that Makes you want to Fly back to New York for one day for.
The West Coast chinese Food
THis is "sweet and Sour Chicken" here.
Where as I much prefer the Greasey New York Version of Sweet and Sour Chicken cuz lets face it, if youre gonna indulge INDULGE man.

Then of course, pizza. Its a no brainer....Gotta get New York real pizza man. All out here For sure...is just mediocre
Best

Best things to be Getting West of the Mississippi Would be California Rolls, Fish Tacos and anything with Veggies.


Course, my opinion leaves everything else known to our country in the Middle. And How do you really choose the best...What makes you right? What changes your mind, and converts you to forming a new idea???


Simply by Taste.

We all prefer one thing over another...we choose to live a certain way, a believe in things we see, or feel. We go with our gut feelings.
My taste in Clothes, food and Beliefs may not be in your taste. But Its why GOD created us to be individuals, equal among men, but Reaching to be something more.

So here we are. About to Start February, 16 days away from Sophie's ear surgery, which I havent really been touching base on publicly, as it is a sensitive subject still in my heart, mind and family.

With that in Mind, our choice to implant Sophies ear, isnt really because we find it to be the right thing to do. Truth be told, I felt guilty thinking about Not implanting her because the "world" around us thinks other wise. So We ARE NOT implanting Sophie to "FIX" her. Shes not broken. Shes not less then anyone. Shes not limited. Shes Sophie. Simply Sophie. Our Choice has led us to also decide that Implantation will also not be allowed to define her. As the World wants us to push sounds, and speaking and voices and her using her voice on her...that Will not be the case in our house. Our FEELINGS are as such, that if she doesnt want to...we wont make her...if shes tired of it, she doesnt have to use it, if she feels like skipping therapy, So be it. I want her to have environmental awareness and having an implant will get her that. However, Vocal needs...NO. We are A Signing family and will remain to be. Others have their opinion on our situation, but no one knows Sophie better then we do. This Device is not a fix it...its a helper, and she can decide later what she wants to do with it....our choice!



Happy Tuesday Friends, it was A good January, Hope it ends well for all

Monday, January 9, 2012

Come what May

Does everyone fit to the same shaped object?
Does anyone walk the same walk as his neighbor?

I do not think so.

While We may stumble upon similiar situations as our fellow mankind. And have 2cents to put into the other travels pot. maybe that 2cents would be put to better use in your very own pocket.

Not everyone is excited, or happy about the decision to get out of the Military life. its a great life for those who want it, for those who can make it work, for those with will power to miss out, and leave behind and skrimp and save every nickle and dime. Its well suited for families who were once single soldiers who built a family after signing over their life to that of the Military.
But like I said, Not everyone is able to fit into the cookie cutter shapes of the army.
Not everyone has the same experiences we've had outside and in the Army. Not everyone understands the Army until they've experienced the life. Not just watched from afar. But literally got their hands dirty.

Based on logic for a Bohemian lifestyle in which we are acostumed to, one would image it the perfect life for a traveler. But As I have stated in pervious Blogs, my mind set, especially as a mother has changed. I find myself twitching at the thought of Military schools. Possible Deployments, long hours as rank is gained...Midnight calls to rescue Intoxicated Soldiers, other peoples business and their family woes and fueds. Where my husband is taken away from OUR time. Prime kid time, where much happens and much is missed in his absense. Selfish sure, but I want him there for it all.
Not for nothing, but my kids have a sharing problem probably because Im not big on sharing. The time We have on earth is precious. So why waste it? Why be stuck in ruts? Why miss out of those moments of awe and enjoyment because of work? Why beat yourself ragged one day, to miss out, and do it all over again the next? Surely, We can manage a life outside the Army. We have before. And mind you done much better on time and finance then we have in the past 2 years working and living under government sanctions.
2012 is going to be a bigger deal personally for me, then 2011 was. in which case I did a ton of soul search and changing in. Grew up and matured in different ways, realized things about myself and my family...2012 will not be anything short of a change. Spiritually, mentally, physically.
A year is a long time for sure. As we have just started, maybe its a bit...early to make plans. Maybe we have jumped the gun a bit on sharing news of getting out. Maybe Things will be different in a few months.
But Come what may. My hope is that people will be understanding, and accepting of what happens. For I know whats meant to be will be. I can not forsee what our year will look like, But I know what I want, what we want and what we feel long term will be best...and for right now Military life....well we will see

Friday, January 6, 2012

Birthday treats.









HAPPY birthday Sophie. My happy girl. my Funny girl. My princess. Rockstar...break dancer. Beautiful, smarty pants bright star. You fill our lives with joy, laughter and love. You keep us on our toes and have taught us much. Youre a great sister and amazing Daughter. We love you so much and can not believe you are 3 already. Stay sweet forever, always be you.

LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE YOU Sophie Ge-ge.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

The 5th

More to come tomorrow.


But I have to post about my gorgeous girl. my Lovey dovey, smart and funny daughter. Sophia Gabrielle, I could not be any prouder to be your mama. I love you so so so so so so so so Much my darling. Just as you are, Forever more.
I can not believe you are 3. Time is flying by. You are growing into a wonderful little girl, such life and light shine from you. Simply you are amazing. Im sad time is going so fast, but I rejoice in the little girl you are becoming. Im truly blessed my love.

God's perfect gift to me that January.

Happy Birthday. Happppppy Birthday.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Saw this and found it so cute

If You Give a Mom a Muffin


If you give a mom a muffin,

She’ll want a cup of coffee to go with it.

So she’ll pour herself some.

The coffee will get spilled by her three year old.

She’ll wipe it up.



Wiping the floor, she will find some dirty socks.

She’ll remember she has to do some laundry.

When she puts the laundry in the washer,

She’ll trip over some snow boots and bump into the freezer.

Bumping into the freezer will remind her she has to plan supper for tonight.



She will get out a pound of hamburger.

She’ll look for her cookbook. (101 Things To Make With a Pound of

Hamburger.)

The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail.

She will see the phone bill which is due tomorrow.

She will look for the checkbook.



The checkbook is in her purse that is being dumped out by her two year old.

She’ll smell something funny.

She’ll change the two year old.

While she is changing the two year old the phone will ring. (Of course!)

Her five year old will answer it and hang up.



She remembers that she wants to phone a friend to come over for coffee on

Friday.

Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup.

She will pour herself some.

And chances are,

If she has a cup of coffee,

Her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.



Written by Kathy Fictorie

Based on If You Give a Mouse a Cookie

.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Just a girl

ahhhhhhhhhhhh
Seemed to be the Sound of choice while closing out 2011. December was an epic failure for me in terms of keeping my cool.
Anyone who knows me well, knows about some of the "stuff" I put myself through. The challenges, the ups and downs, the wild thoughts and the complaining I love doing. Anyone who knows me well, knows me well enough to know I USUALLY, again USUALLY can handle a ton, and keep my composure. Especially in front of other people, in public, with friends over, Dinning out, or shopping in good Ole' Walmart. I have been told "I dont know how you do it" "I cant believe you were so calm, I would not have been if that just happened to me"like from my Friend Amy when Trying to calm 3 crazy loud fighting and crying kids down to watch a movie at her house. Even she left the room to "make Coffee" because Truly the kids were WILD. I get embarrassed easily, and so to not shame myself even further Keeping calm in those situations are the only thing I know how to do.
Its not "impressive" its how I cope. At Home sure, I flip, Ill yell, Ill give time outs, and Swear in my head when Sophie and Ryan are fighting on who gets to sit on my lap...which happens EVERY time Im sitting in the livingroom after Dinner. I roll my eyes and giggle a little when my body flinging son throws the mother of all tantrums over something so minute.
Ive never really been the punishing kind, Ryan pinches Emily, and I tell him no. Ryan is playing with the blinds and I can yell out loud and he just laughs but once Daddy raises his voice while Ryan is doing it, Ryan RUNS off crying. WTH.??? NOT FAIR ;) At home Ive created bratty loveable monsters but they are pretty awesome kids and pretty well behaved in public (usually).

But December was new territory for me. I couldnt form a sentence with out grinding my teeth, swearing, or punching something hard. Sophie couldnt drop her yogurt with out being sent to her room for 5 minutes. Ryan wouldnt stay in his crib and I had to just leave him crying to fall asleep. The house couldnt get clean enough, the Cats crying was making me want to rip off my own ears. Problem after Problem, issue after issue, bad news and more bad news kept creeping up at every turn I made. I felt myself Leaving my body. I was not myself, I felt out of control and unstable. Irritable, sad, angry, no control over emotions. Was losing my mind, and my family was getting the brunt of my frustration. I had missed a period and BAM....My little bit of grasp I had left of reality flew right out of my hand. Thats it...I knew it. I just knew it. I was in total manic mode. Sick all day, head aches and leg pains at night, crying fits and wanting no one to touch me. My taste buds were crazy, I hated the taste of chicken and loved ketchup....GROSS.
My face and Arms looked like I had balloon animals glued to them. Insomnia and weird ass dreams when I did finally get to sleep.
An utter utter utter nutty mess. December...ugh...December
Christmas Came and went, I had put on a great face, Truly was excited, and happy for the kids and loved the cooking and baking I was doing. Enjoyed the family time we had. But under neath it all....I still was a mess. What was I to do. Daily waiting and waiting and looking for the period that was M.I.A. Still nauseous, still panicing I made an appt with the Doctor at the end of December. The week before DRAGGED on, that Friday couldnt come fast enough. Thankfully, when it did arrive. Barely anyone was in the waiting area. I GOT weighed and Felt my EYE bug out of my head at the number...NOT COOL.
Sat with the nurse and told her how I was feeling. She says "give me an example of a mood swing your having" and As I was telling her I could feel myself panicing and getting anxious and tears forming....so she stopped me and Just told me to wait. Doc came in shortly after....we talked...he examed me...we talked more...I cried 2x. Like not even just tears, like FULL ON I COULDNT TALK CRYING. Finishing up with him, he sent me to get blood work done. Then I waited...and waited...and waited...

Picked up my presciptions and went home.
He Set me up with Celexa, an anit-depression and anxiety medication. told me it would take a few weeks to get into my system. Give it some time, and come back in a few weeks and we will see how things are. Then work on my weight loss.phew...ok. If thats what needs to be done for me to feel like Becci again. Fine. BRING IT ON. I have to start out 2012 on a good foot and if being on some "happy pills" is the way to start then great...fine...ok...
Literally I do mean LITERALLY 24hrs after my appointment with the doctor.
Aunt FLOW (wink wink)finally showed up for her visit. OOO the Luck.
I can not believe it. ON New years Eve Nonetheless. WELCOME NEW YEAR.

And here I am 4 days later, FEELING LIKE BECCI. Not as insane, not as moody, NO hysteria or punching of cabinets while waiting on the phone to talk to cable with those stupid automated voices. No more yogurt punishments or hiding out. I can breathe easy, I have BEEN SLEEEEEEEPING (rejoice) laughing and smiling just because I can. All the while still taking those Meds. But according to reach, it wont be in my system and regulating things for a few weeks still. So...was I just a menstrating momzilla??? HARDCORE PMSING stress machine? After 18 months of very regular Aunt Flow visits, being thrown off the track like that must have sent my emotions over the edge. What now tho? DO I continue Celexa? And wait till my Feb appointment with the Doc to say "oooops i was pmsing" ????????





Ahhhhhhhhhh Seems to be the sound of choice again, But THANKFULLY for a much different reason. ;)
Who knew how much my hormones were still so teenage like...
Just a Girl. Im still just a Girl.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

The List

HAPPPPPY New Year Faithful Readers, Friends and Family.
Im So excited for this year to start. So much can happen in one year and I want this one to be the Best year so far for our Little Family. AS we embark on this new year, and yet another year older, maybe a tad more wiser, with a brighter tint of joy. Lets think positive, lets be smart, lets get up and move. Lets not be held by fear. Now that all my babies are no longer babies :( It will be interesting to see where our family is directed.
So Welcome 2012. Let us begin.



2012 To-Do list.

A list Of items I myself would like to see done. As well as a few Family to-do's. If we can accomplish them all this year then We are SUper;)



~ Start and finish my CNA course.
~ Finish my nutrition class
~ Finish decorating the house, including curtains and area rugs.
~ Find awesome bunk beds for girls
~ Get a new Car
~ Pay off some debt
~ Start and finish successfully at losing weight. Goal 5pds a month.
~ Drive up to Forks for the day
~ Go to The Local Fairs
~ Enroll kids in Gymnastics, swimming lessons and maybe riding lessons.
~ Schedule Sophies Surgery
~ Teach Emily how to write out the entire Alphabet and have her learn letter sounds
~ Learn 200 more signs.
~ Find a good night Job
~ Register kids with CYS
~ Register Girls For School
~ Master a few good recipes
~ Write 10 chapters of a hit novel
~ Have more date nights
~ Family fun night out once a month
~ figure out pizza dough lol
~ grow my hair
~ take up jogging
~ Do a few home crafts, like make my own wreaths
~ Drink less beer
~ Take up yoga and do it 3 times a week
~ Burns more candles and incense
~ Print out our photos and make photo albums
~ Speak to my brothers more often
~ Show more appreciation toward matt
~ Control my temper better
~ Instead of working on getting new friendships, work on the ones I have
~ Donate time and support to Charty,give back what we can
~ Get our family portraits done.
~ Find a good Church
~ Find a good childrens Bible Story Book
~ Try new food
~ Start signing Sentences as a family
~ Visit the local water parks
~ Fence in the back yard
~ Get Matts Tamaskan asap
~ Fix the cats
~ Get our passports and visit Canada
~ Go camping at least once
~ Maybe get on a cruise to Alaska
~ Get matt his gaming system finally
~ Rent a boat and Go fishing
~ Visit Leavenworth WA for the Christmas Light Show





Lots to do, lots we would like to get done in the next year and a half we have in Washington state. Im sure Im missing some things But I can always add more to this later down the line.
I pray for an amazing year, for this family who has been through enough for right now. I pray for health and safety, for our family and All of our friends and family out there. May this year find everyone well.
Happy New years...

LETS get this Party started