Leaving Barstow

Theres this crap movie called leaving Barstow. So amist todays joyful news I found it quite the fitting title.
At 6am This morning matt scared me half to death mid dream. He looked mad at first, but what can I tell out of it and eyes only half open."its MAY 3rd" he yelled. "Ummyea..." I replied~ "yea well be at FORT LEWIS byJune 10th" pointing his finger at me flashing a big ole grin. By then my eyes were wide open! So many times he had tricked me, andthis time he was serious. But at 6am....GRRRRRR i couldnt fall back to sleep and went down stairs to have him pull up the system online so i can see for myself. And there it was.FINALLLLLLLLLY!
Bitter sweet as I will miss the few ladies I love here, and the comfort of the Sandy Basin pool on the hot days! But I will not miss
Toronado like winds, scorpions, poisonous snakes, Bitches who spread the gossip here and go out of their way to be mean. I will not miss this nasty Commissary or the long ass drives to civilization and Doctor appointments.
We will be able to start Sophies surgery and speech therapy. BE SOMEWHERE GREEEEEN! Somewhere that rains! (washington state obviously rains a ton). Will be close to a community school for me to take classes that mean something. Have snow! and Seasons! Near Beaches!
Although its not closer to NY, and although Ill be really far from home when deployments happen, we will be in a better location then we are now. No more scary sun spiders and giant black spiders to worry about!

Another fresh start for this Family.
Our moving time frame, will mean we lived in Cali, exactly a year. California is nothing spectacular, Im not even gonna bat an eye or look back when we cross state lines.But at least I can say we've been there, lived there, saw that, felt the pacific ocean. Saw Hollywood and San Diego zoo! Cant forget Cali! Its Ryans Birth state!
But we cant wait to take that final drive off! Kiss the Coyote and pass the painted rocks.

That trip down that lonely and dusty two way highway will be so wonderful...knowing we wont be headed back through those empty Mountains...
Good Bye Fort Irwin! Thanks for Showing us what we dont want in a Military Base!

Im sure ill have something to complain about in Washington! After All im Becci and Im woman and mom and wife, and complaining is what I do! but to know that being Army also means we get to move and see other places, curves my raints...at the same time, being in the program we are in for Sophie (efmp) means we can try and stay in one place longer then the average! If we like it that much. We are also being told now that EFMP gives usother advantages in the moving part. Fast turn out and faster new housing! So hopefully we will be leaving before May is over! Otherwise...June bloom for another Decker ADVENTURE!!!

When it rains it hales

Last year something happened. I got to spend time with another member of my biological family! Which was great in getting a glimpse into the family I barely know! For those of you who dont know! I was adopted by my Biological mothers sister, officially when I was 3. Grew up always knowing I was adopted and truth be told, in adoption its best to always make that known,the Child deserves to know. My family is Great! My dad always worked hard for us, my Mother spent her days pining over our affection and time spent with her! Took care of us and was always our back-up. My 3 crazy brothers, always made the day interesting and I like to think my best of friends with my Brother John, whos only 3 years younger then I. Ups and downs in our family. Horrible Illness-spats of fighting-clingy-ness-independence and at the end of a 24 year roller coaster ride...a divorce!
Leading us all to our separate ways! Family I barely speak to, and cant see! Only because we live so away.
When My hubs and I ran off to Florida last year we spent time with my Aunt! A blood relative! And I remember in the first few times she had asked me this..."Am I anything like your mother?" weird to ask one would think right away! Right?
Well, at first! I said no! But now as time has passed by! I realize in fact...she is just like my mom, and my mom just like her, and I...JUST LIKE THE BOTH OF THEM!...stubborn, grudge keeping, neurotic (about different things sure, but the extend of it all is closely related),loving with all our person! sparatic! Ever changing! scared! Holding back of emotion until it explodes,clingy, bossy! huge MOOD swings!Paranoid! A battle with in us,that puts a wall around us! RESENTMENT! Easy to write people off! the list of our similarities could go on! GOOD and BAD!
Ive always said I have a gypsy soul! And While I still believe that true...and more truer as my days progress on, and im molding more into....dare I say it!
I can now say that the true factor that over takes who I am as A person, especially in my state of mind right now (upset at my husband) that In my emotions "HALE" the Name to which Myself and these ladies where born into,previals! Making me say "when it storms it HALES".
All beautiful women! All covering up deeply emotional wounds that bring us"close" in our stories~in our lives~even with out spoken words!
Theres really no denying the strength of this blood line~

Tearful Mommy Moments, and my middle Finger!

Today, is a day just like any other. Theres not really anything different or exciting going on. we are still in our Pj's and just been cleaning while Major Tornado's come behind me and destroy it again! So I took a break! Turned on OC housewives, of course with Captions on, because with my 3 kids running around playing "house" you cant hear a darn word.

Of course, When you sit back and take a moment just to watch little kids in action you remember that all things simple, are the most fun! They Could have a million noise making, shaking, moving on their own, talking toys,but the biggest hits will be the Old worn, Minature plastic Play house dolls(we one they fight over all the time). A man with no hands and permanent marker all over his wrestling body, a Few Balls, and empty Easter Baskets seem to be the Toys of choice! My kids can take anything and Make it Fun! They use of a jump rope as a balance Beam, The ottoman as a bed, balls as extra "Kids" and imaginary friends that come to visit! The moments that make me proud and thankful is to see my girls,play together. NICELY with out any hiccup of a fight! Then to see Ryan "try" and Join in. AS long as hes next them, minding his own business sucking on some kind of toy, or using his bottle as a travel mug, hes happy as a clam!

Of course, It was this morning as Im watching OC housewives, I had a mini-happy melt down. Sophie had Scrapped her foot outside during a friends birthday party when she took her shoes off. So a tiny piece of skin is missing, and you would think her foot was falling off. She keeps holding it and making her sad face. :) too cute! Again this morning is when sh ran to me,holding up that foot for me to magically kiss the boo-boo all better! FOR THE MILLIONITH TIME! So I kiss it and quickly off she goes to play like nothing is wrong. Which for some reason started this happy tear. Her communication with Us has gotten so much better. Yes, she has a scary crazy temper...but really more then that, shes so gentle and simple and easy. I started Crying! My kids are amazing. My family is amazing! And Though sometimes are hard and I flip out. I really couldnt ask to have it any other way! Or Any better! Attitude and All I love it dearly!

Sophies ability to be so cute! Makes me melt! She touches Ryans head with a pat and a rub. Smiles at him with such love. When she saw Emily for the first time this morning she ran to her and gave her two big hugs. Hugs daddy every time he walks thru the door. Walks him out by holding door for him and waving goodbye out the window (after she slams door behind him of course). She has Matts need for CLean and helps clean up better then Emily does, whose a natural slob like me! Is obsessed with Dr.Seuss books (mostly green eggs and ham) Loves action adventure scenes like jumping off building and seeing white water rafting, she gets her excited face on and keeps giving High fives. Finally starting to potty train (thank the Lord).
In no way shape or form does her deafness hinder who she is. Or what she wants. And fingers crossed with our help,she'll never feel it! Though, sadly kids are mean, and I see her left out a lot, with groups of kids :( and that breaks my heart! Shes resourceful and finds something to do on her own, or hangs with Ryan and I, with Adults. Who sadly to say, still arent as "accepting" of her,SOME that is! Not everyone! People are ignorate and they dont get it! Especially Women (no offense to some)they seem to be so judgemental of Children and compare and contrast and make COMPETITIONS out of everything, especially Child rearing! Which is so sad. Sometimes I want to burst out of my comfort zone and composure and SLAP a Bi-otch! Like,seriously, I could care less if your 2 year old daughter, can say supercalifragilisticexpialidocious front and backwards while doing a cartwheel and blowing bubbles out their ears! really? Really? Some of them sit there smug saying "well...BLAH BLAH BLAH my son, my daughter, at their age...I never allow that, or this. " like really? Dont you see my invisble Middle FINGER WAVING AT YOU!? If I didnt have some Class, I'd never be invited anywhere!
Its like "hey thanks for trying to put my kids in a soap box"
LIke lets see...sly remarks on my parenting "oo my kids know not to write on walls even if I have to hover over them while they have crayons"...SMACK in my face because they went thru a phase. Hello its not the end of the world. Magic eraser or some paint bitch! Get over it!!!!!!!!!!
Or to be slapped in my face this weekend, while talking about the saying that while Pregnant with girls, they say they steal the mothers beauty! Someone looked at me and laughed when I said that and said
"Well then I guess they took a lot huh?".....A**HOLE! Thanks I feel so great now! again I laugh it off while putting an invisible middle finger up!
Have I mentioned how "WONDERFUL ARMY WIVES here at FORT IRWIN" are lately! *~*~GAG~*~*
So...All in all! I just love this family, and Im happy, and Im happy to spend it mostly at home, eating air popped pop corn in our Pjs watching Mickey Mouse Club house,and of course Bloggin!~

Word to the wise, if you wonder! What to say, in regards to Sophie or any other uniquely wonderful person! Never say, You feel bad, or sorry for them, or put them in a box~ Especially so young! Be it for something in life like, being deaf, blind, sick, hard time reading, spelling, OCD, CP, diabetic, ADD, ADHD, Autistic, allergies, limb issues, deformities, premies, OR whatever else "different" is out there. Just be kind, Be sweet! Be sincere! With good intentions, and never with labels. Sometimes, ignorance makes her look stupid! Sorry! If you dont like what Im saying! BUt until you know...what its like! Being insensitive and judgemental is not becoming!
Im growing a bigger pair of mommy "balls" and Dont let me catch you saying anything about my kids with any distain! OR about disablities (even small)Cuz ima be a bull!
I dont wish to change my family, just how most people immediately think! Harsh World because people dont think before they speak!

Faith and the Easter Bunny

The way I was Raised, In A Baptist Church has always stuck with me. Sure, times I fought it, Ran away, looked to other places...I was always Brought back to what I already new. Now, AS An Adult and A mother and Wife, I have passed Down onto my kids Faith! I dont label myself in Religious Files, But I say...I am A Christian. And I have Faith! Faith in the Lord God, Faith that Jesus died for our sins and rose again! That he shelters us, loves us, Keeps Us grounded, Gives us Something to look forward to! I believe in Heaven, and Evilness. I READ THE BIBLE! I proudly share BIBLE verses. I Sing Worship songs in the shower and Around Friends and Family AS LOUD as I can (though sometimes to just annoy them with my voice,..AH-HEM Rashan!) OR Share Childhood Christian Songs with Friends Like My Sammi and Lexi..."I've got the wonderful love of my blessed Redeemer way down in the depths of my heart" :)
So, To fulfilling to me, to Hear Emily Talk about Jesus, and Somewhat Understand Christian Holidays As I explain them...because she doesnt go to Sunday School yet! While at the Same time!...Loves Easter Bunny's and Santa Claus And Dressing up for Halloween. And Thats ok! We want Our kids to experience it ALL! While, Some others may look at us with doubts and Frowns at how we parents, we rejoice in it! We dont shelter our kids too much, and we talk freely about the World around us. They Know whats right and wrong, and bad and good, real and pretend! ANd We think even at their age, its a good thing to know.
It was a Work day for Matt today! So the Easter Bunny snuck up stairs During Matts Lunch Break...Left the kids Baskets to enjoy! And BOY were they so thankful and excited.

We had Fun! A really Great Weekend. Took some Time to Visit the Easter Bunny Yesterday! Leave it to Fort Irwin, to have him in front of a med-chopper!

Then we closed the Evening with Some Coloring of Eggs!

The day We step back And Recongize all we have doesnt just have to be on Holidays Or Celebration days! Jesus Died for us to Live, He Died so that we can be Free from Sin, So shall we Ask! So Shall we Believe. He Rose and Showed his strength and Power and Might, for us and for those Non-believers. He Died So that This family, and the Millions out there, Could spend our days Happy and together! He lives, so that one day, we will be greeted by him! He lives for us! In lives in Us!
My Life is Wonderful, because of my Faith! My Faith has led me to where I am. The Rocky Road, Was my doing! But We are here, and He has never left!
So Closing With Some Scripture!From the One True place, where the message, though, in different styles has always remained the same!

Romans 1:4-5
And Jesus Christ our Lord was shown to be the Son of God when God powerfully raised him from the dead by means of the Holy Spirit. Through Christ, God has given us the privilege and authority to tell Gentiles everywhere what God has done for them, so that they will believe and obey him, bringing glory to his name.

Romans 5:6-11
For when we were still helpless, Christ died for the wicked at the time that God chose. 7 It is a difficult thing for someone to die for a righteous person. It may even be that someone might dare to die for a good person. 8 But God has shown us how much he loves us—it was while we were still sinners that Christ died for us! 9 By his b...lood we are now put right with God; how much more, then, will we be saved by him from God's anger! 10 We were God's enemies, but he made us his friends through the death of his Son. Now that we are God's friends, how much more will we be saved by Christ's life!
11 But that is not all; we rejoice because of what God has done through our Lord Jesus Christ, who has now made us God's friends.

1 Corinthians 15:17-20 "Unless Christ was raised to life, your faith is useless, and you are still living in your sins. And those people who died after putting their faith in him are completely lost. If our hope in Christ is good only for this life, we are worse off than anyone else. But Christ has been raised to life! And he makes us certain that others will also be raised to life."

"And the angel answered and said unto the women, Fear not ye: for I know that ye seek Jesus, which was crucified. He is not here: for he is risen, as he said. Come, see the place where the Lord lay. And go quickly, and tell his disciples that he is risen from the dead; and, behold, he goeth before you into Galilee; there shall ye see him: lo, I have told you." Matthew 28:5-7


Happy Easter Friends and Family!

Wind-la-lo-Wind

A day at the park here in So-Cal sometimes isnt as easy as 1,2,3. More often then not we hold on for dear life as we even try to pile into the Van. But We cant be couped up All day, everyday! And on those days I actually can get us all out of the house before something or someone breaks down and things go Terribly Wrong, We enjoy the Sunny life~

Then...we try to RUN! Run through that forceful Wind and well! Not always is it a success~

Other times you just Grin and Bare it~

Just put on a happy face and go with it~

We Sit in the Sun, and walk the Gravel. The Sandy Tone of Emptiness that surrounds us, Day in and day out! Climb up those Ladders and Enjoy that fearless Ride Down! Round and Round we go, till our little legs are all tuckered out!

Just another day! Just another Slide! But what brings a smile to our faces, is usually something just so Simple! So easy! So carefree!

And WHY not just smile! Just Because! Because it FEELS good!

Because At the End of the day! No Matter how Full, or how Boring! All we Have is our Family. Doesnt Matter what we do together, how much Money is in the Bank or what creditors are calling our line! We Have Each other, we and Sunshine! And Health, And Faith, and thats a good enough reason to JUST Smile! And as for that WIND...No Matter how hard it Blows! Still...We Smile!

Birthday pictures

Looking Good in Baby Blue. One of the birthday gifts from her Poppi and Jessica!She loves the way it moves n in her words "not itchy"
Her birthday was good, low key, just us, Daddy got home early, yummy homemade Chocolate Cake with Pink frosting

We Did nothing all day! Watched a few movies, played at home. Cleaned, napped and took a spin in the "truck". Sang a happy birthday song and opened gifts. It was a day of love!

Silly faces with mommy!

Birthday gift from her "boyfriend" and his family. She still wont let go!

Daddy's little Tom-boys!

Minus the California WIND! the days here are simply beautiful out!

light up shoes!!!!

Dr.Seuss YES YES please! We love these books!

lastly is Ryan with his Mozart Cube! He and Soph think its great

"Empire State of Mind" Jay-Z | Alicia Keys [OFFICIAL VIDEO]

Missing My New York. I Spent my whole life trying hard to get away! Managed it more times then I believed. MADE it all the way to the WEST coast! But! Its not all that! I have changed so much, and who would have thought I'd miss OC. ???? really I dont even believe it myself. No Matter where I am, who Im with, what outs goin on, the NEW YORK in me always shines thru! In my blood, Mid-City Water running thru my veins baby! Italian Food(y) that Built the way. Replaced O's with Aw's my whole life, left out important T's in Words and put extra A's at the end where its not needed. What can I say!?...What can I say "Wrong" according to Non-Southern New Yorkers!
Ironic? Maybe. Im the epitome of an oxy-moron. A gypsy who wants to plant Roots. An Adventurist who likes plans, A dreamer who packs a head of time. A Writer who can not spell, and hates grammar! A Christian who cusses! A Singer who cant play an instrument! Studying Fitness when I have 50 pounds to shed! I Could go on Forever(a) lol.
But I am who I am, I love myself, and I tell others to take me or leave me.
Point is...New York, no matter how far or long Im gone. Will always be with me! Who I am. And where I came from.
Missing my Ladies tonight,
Thinking about Sex and the City (thanks Benny)
Jamming to Alicia and JZ and waiting for lil Man to be in Bed so I stop being Bitched at by my 9mth old who's learned a ton of Attitude from his sisters!
Nighty Night!