Wednesday, December 14, 2011

All I meant~

Lets talk.

Have you ever wondered about epiphanies?
How they happen? what triggers the thought?
For me it happens in my writing. Even sometimes amist Chaos and confusion as I have my two little kids fighting over my middle lap space.

I love that 2011 has been such a growing process for my family and I. I love what we have learned about each of our children. Seeing them grow and discover. Even during the rough, all I want to do is sleep through this terrible experience moments, I can find that glimmer of thankful reality.

In my last blog I spoke about individualities and creating an environment based of nurturing the spirit more then mind. I spoke about my feelings toward the harsh methods among the educational system in place for my daughter Sophia.
I today realized in a conversation that while my statements came off harsh on the education system. I also meant what I said.
Yes my child is different, needs assistance, needs more things. Not just my child, not just her difference. When I say I meant what I said about also understand that I do support the system in place. I understand the dynamics. I know the reasoning behind the grading and placing and calculating. I understand the purpose of having a chart of milestones as guidelines. I do. I do~ Its pretty simple to understand.
So again my speaking about it, is about MY FEELINGS. Im not saying do away with the system. Im not saying its uncalled for. But What I am saying. Is that to me...again to me....the word "evaluation" is just a pretty way of saying "we are comparing".
So for me. A mom who knows her daughter is deaf. Who knows she has lots to learn and catch up on, who feels like her disablity isnt as limiting as others are. For a mother who loves Sophie just the way she is. Having a system that technically COMPARES my daughter to the "norm" bothers me.
But its my opinion. Its my fight with in me.
granted. State to state guidelines are pretty different and San Bernadino County California, did not have a separate education milestone chart for disabilites, or for the deaf, so her comparisions are made against Average hearing children. TELL ME WHERE THAT IS FAIR.
At the same time. Because I feel theres nothing WRONG with Sophie or her being deaf, the need for special intervention....well. thats for a another blog. THe point is my epiphany in all this is that, while we adored Sophies intervention teachers in California, I realized. As soon as we STOPPED intervention for our move...BAM she was communicating up a storm. She has COME miles since we stopped intervention, literally ;). She is signing more then ever. Expressing more then ever. And If I were to tally up her "abilities" on a milesstone report sheet. The only ones missing are verbal. She can now tell me, what she wants. Where something is, go find something when I ask her. Point stuff out. PLays pretend, EVEN BARKS when its a Dog shes pretending to be. She can put her shoes on, she can undress herself, tell me when she needs to go potty or be changed from a pull-up. Tells me when shes tired and ready for bed. What Movie she wants to watch. So...yes. My feeling my daughter is a typical well rounded average little almost 3 year old is correct. But Education institues COUNT on paper work. And because shes deaf, and it is a Disablity she needs IFSP plan to attend schools and receive SSI. and to be seen by special pediatric clinics.
We are all God's children and should be treated as such.
with "AVERAGE" kids You dont see their parents being sat down and told what to do for them, to them, with them. They dont get to hear what to expect,or about any problems unless they are in school and the issue is out of control.
Maybe Im reaching to far out on this one. But hopefully you see my point.
I love my daughter. I love all my kids. I love EVERY child. special needs or not. Im going to respect them, as I am teaching my children to respect them as well.